Cloverdale's Superclown and Impersonator

She's brash and crass
Queen of sarcasm
And snappy come backs

She flew up from Cleveland
Because your "Victim" has
Information she can use against
Her "Pork Boy" Drew
But they lost her bag
At the airport so she grabbed
One she liked, which she
Explores and tries some of the
Contents on your poor "Victim"

Finally she sings a customized
Version of "Cleveland Rocks"
Using info you provide